Hi there, guys and dolls! Ah, autumn – little crispness in the air, the splendor of nature’s glory in the changing of the leaves. The pain in the you know what as they fall and clutter up the yard…sigh. And you know in my neck of the woods where nobody minds their own business, one must keep up with the Jones, the Smiths, the Garcias, everyone.

Hence my leaves. I’ll admit I’ve left it, hoping they would just rot and become next year’s soil, but I got really tired of Millie, Val, Sal, Milly (the other one) and even Betty Sue who usually couldn’t give a toss what state my yard is in tsking and shaking their heads at me in utter disgrace that my lawn wasn’t neat and tidy, all the leaves raked away, not somehow offending them with their untidy display.

Fine. I’ll recruit some help. I got out my little black book and came across Ned. Oh, darling Ned! I haven’t seen him since last fall when the leaves needed raking. He loves doing that stuff. And cheap! One nice dinner, a little snuggle that I thoroughly enjoyed and accounts are settled til the next round of yard work needs doing. Yep, Ned is it!

And really, I don’t know why I wait so long before seeing him again. If I remember correctly, he’s a real sweetie, kinda cute in the Archie, red hair and freckles kind of way. Loves the outdoors, fresh in every way (as in smells clean but also tries a little something on which I’m always game for – heck, if he doesn’t, I will and honestly, I have no problem being that kind of girl ;-)).

So Ned shows up and all goes well. We get a little work done, Milly and Betty Sue walk by and give me a nod of approval, not only for getting the yard work done, but for picking such an attractive helper. Jealous much, ladies? Fine by me. I’ve worked long and hard to hand pick my stable of stallions, er, friends, helpers, whatever…

And of course, we take a little break. There’s a nip in the air and body heat is the best way to keep warm, I always find. Anyhoo, after a little canoodling I do find it’s getting hot. No, not like that, but there’s actual heat, as in fire, as in smoke, crackling, flying ash and cinders! Holy smoke (yep, had to use that pun)! It seems that we’ve got a roaring bonfire. And then all in a brilliant flash I remember why I hadn’t seen him since last fall. Ned’s red hair isn’t the only fiery thing about him. Danged fool was loco for flames and almost burned down the neighborhood! Quickly I got the hose, bucket and ran around screaming, and managed to get the blaze out. Then I told Ned the Guy Fawkes imposter to take a hike.

Of course, now the back yard looks worse than before with the sooty pile of the now extinguished bonfire. That’s okay, once it’s cool I’ll just spread the remaining leaves back over top and it’ll look like it did before I started raking the leaves. Millie, Val, Sal, other Milly and even Betty Sue can just lump it!

Thanks for reading and stay tuned for more posts. And don’t forget to give my Poppy Cove Mysteries a try if you haven’t already. 

Toodles, Barbara Jean